October 19, 2011

Hey all - today will be my last blog until next Monday, as the RAIN conference starts tomorrow and I will be joining the leaders for prayer from 6-7 in the morning then off to church for a long day.  :)

Paulette sent this Monday and I forgot to forward to the fam: Swanson Health Products website has xylotol, coconut flour and other products at less price than health food stores swansonvitamins.com    This is great if you can't find, but Peachtree Natural Foods has most of the same stuff and you don't have to pay shipping.  But THANKS, Paulette, sometimes it's easier to have it arrive at the door.  :)   The almond flour I buy in bulk is from Honeyville.

Want to share an experience I had on Monday - maybe you can relate.  I was resting after doing the dishes following a long day and for a second I "wandered off" to a place in my mind's eye where I saw myself stuffing my mouth with pizza and brownies.  As I "watched" myself eating that, my eyes filled with tears.  My heart was so burdened - I was like "Oh, God, no."  Then I was literally sick to my stomach and so upset for a few seconds - stunned at what I "saw."   The dread in my heart was, "please, I can't go to jail again."   I saw myself trying to get into my clothes, struggling to live, depressed at what I looked like, taking a hand full of pills daily.   I wasn't afraid - just that gut wrenching - I JUST CAN'T DO THIS AGAIN. NO!   It was at that point that I realized all these people that keep pronouncing over me that I cannot live in fear, that I have to eventually add all foods, in moderation, back into my diet and that I cannot continue to allow fear to torment me - have no clue.  I am not afraid of "jail" - I detest it!   It makes me sick to think of eating the way I used to and accepting the death sentence I shoved in my mouth each day.

I was so happy when I came to my "right mind" and was reminded of the truth from Galatians 5:1.  My prayer for each of us is NO fear, but a healthy vision of foods that lead to death.  We have talked a lot about those - you know.  :)   Okay, so maybe I am little whacked - but this really happened and I am glad.   That deep sorrow reminded me that jail (being obese) is NOT an option AGAIN.   "I will stand strong and no longer let MYSELF be burdened AGAIN with a yoke of slavery"   (Gal 5:1)

 

Choose life and eat to live, PK

PS - if you want to join a group of us who are praying at the same time, in our own homes, tomorrow morning from 6-7 for the RAIN conference, feel free.